We’ve all been there — a friendship disagreement leads to bad blood, awkwardness, and lots of reflecting on your mistakes. Unfortunately, I’m no exception; this past year, I experienced the most intense friendship fallout I’ve ever had. The sticky situation led me to do some serious thinking about where I went wrong throughout our friendship; so, that being said, here are the six most important things I learned from a major friendship fallout.
1. Take their advice with a grain of salt.
In the midst of this friendship, I began my first-ever relationship, and I’d just moved away from home for the first time. This means that I constantly needed advice about how to navigate such new environments. But looking back, I definitely relied on my friends’ advice way too much — especially for people that I’d only known for a couple of months.
Whenever I had a conflict with my boyfriend, and whenever I didn’t know how to manage a school issue, I always ran right to my friends for help. And even though it was helpful at the time, taking their advice all the time didn’t challenge me to make my own decisions. I also shouldn’t have relied on their advice as if they were relationship or school experts — because they weren’t, and no decision should be made entirely based on another person’s judgement. It was detrimental for me to rely on them, not only for my own growth, but also for our friendship; I had no idea what their intentions were, nor did I know that they had the relevant experience or wisdom to advise me. Sometimes, it’s better to just trust your gut and move along.